Jungle Diet

So Rosemary Shrager has come out of the jungle 2 stone lighter. Why she got like that in the first place, along with Colin Baker, isn't clear, but why don't the overweight people watching take note how much happier and pleased with themselves they are? Two weeks on rice and beans and Bob's your uncle. Cheap. Simple. Nutritious. Yes, boring as hell, and you're damned hungry, but grow a spine and some wil power and put up with it. Two weeks. And she's happier, lighter, better, healthier.  It's really a no brainer.
      As mentioned in my earlier post, I woke up on 1st January this year and decided that the photograph of me on Christmas day with the back fat and the chubby cheeks just wasn't me. The thin person was struggling to get out of plump one. I wasn't fat. Most people didn't think I needed to do it. But I did it 7 years ago after my last baby, and it was time to do it again.
    My goal was our summer holiday in Mallorca where we would be with my slim sister and even slimmer Miss Flower, who used to be our night nanny.
    So how did I do it? Well, first off I wish I'd patented my own idea of what is now fashionable, which is the intermittent fasting diet. My own version was to start the diet off with two days of fierce fasting, just to get my mind round the new regime (incidentally the French word for diet). I reckoned my biggish bod could cope with a bit of deprivation.  Otherwise it would be marching straight back to the toaster and the biscuit tin. I kept on a few treats, coffee, cheese and wine so I wasn't totally denying myself.
    Then it was basically cutting out things such as bread and chocolate, and introducing new, healthy, delicious things such as ryvita, avocado, tomato, cottage cheese, fruit, yoghurt, porridge with brown sugar, and regulating helpings and meal times. Broke all the rules. No breakfast, first meal at midday, trying not to eat after 6pm except sometimes Horlicks to stop hunger at night.
   Hmm. Might contact my editor at the Health Section at the Mail on Sunday, see what he thinks about a column?
 

Short Story Advice

http://www.writersworkshop.co.uk/blog/how-to-write-short-stories/

Churchill described Russia as a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma. A short story shouldn't trip you up or leave you in the dark, but it should encapsulate the magic of a critical moment within a life, and all, as Jamie Oliver says, in 15 minutes!

The constraints of time and space are actually liberating. They permit, even challenge, the writer to use its tight structure to create a character's history. Their past, intense present, and the hint of a future. Some stories are left hanging on a cliff edge, leaving you wondering or guessing what comes after. That is fine so long as it isn't too abrupt, or inexplicable. Why alienate your readers by frustrating them? Rather, leave them intrigued, wanting more and especially more from you. Some stories have a twist in the tail which is glorious especially when used in horror stories, but equally effective in a supposedly every day situation. The end should be satisfying but not necessarily trite.

Take inspiration from a snapshot in the street or out of a train window, a note or comment from your own life, news from the world around us, a crazy, sad, mad, mundane idea plucked out of an over-active imagination. So, an awkward family gathering igniting a forbidden passion. An adulterous weekend trashed by a message from home. A crippled woman giving hope to the able- bodied. Nick what you've seen or imagined, dress it, trick it out in technicolour or monochrome depending on the mood you want (I also have a cinematic commentary in the back of my mind when writing). Then load it with drama and potential, propelling it, with the tools of a handful of bright characters and realistic, relevant dialogue, in the direction of and into whatever conclusion you want for it.

So far the only novels and short stories I have published have been erotic (see my other blog, Primula's Progress). But the build up, climax, resolution and afterglow analogy of sex – the outline structure I have already mentioned, in fact - is equally useful for any story telling arc.

You have around 6,000 words, though there are no rules except in competitions, and more experienced writers will restrict their word count to a handful, or expand their story to a novella.

So, you're allowed to, indeed you should, hit the ground running. Place your character straight into the heat of their dilemma or crisis. This can be like plunging into a cold bath, or stepping more tentatively, but the central crux must fairly quickly be visible. The deceptively leisurely approach makes a later shock all the more unexpected.

The golden rule is show, not tell. So paint a picture through scenery and smell, sounds, clothing, even food, to create the atmosphere. Some initial introspection can be helpful to introduce a character's thoughts, their modus vivendi, but not through an over-arching voice that tells us what to see and how to respond.

To avoid the domineering narrator a more dynamic technique is showing a protagonist's interaction and genuine responses, however brief, with their surroundings and other characters. This will flesh them out and make them three dimensional, make us love or loathe them. Dialogue, used skilfully, is an essential tool to reveal what is happening and illustrate how characters react, but it must be realistic. Study the unfairly maligned soaps on telly for consummate script writing. Possibly the most jarring sign of an amateur author is wooden, pompous or over-written dialogue.

Dialogue and narrative combine to drive us inexorably towards their conflict and how they will resolve it. Conflict indicates a moment where a dilemma is faced, a decision or change is required or thrust upon us, like the splitting of two great rivers. A character can tackle it, however chaotically, or they can avoid it. Either way there should be a resolution, even if it is tragic, otherwise we won't have a story.

The stories in 'Stabbing the Rain', my Amazon collection, commit to fiction moments from real life: mysterious encounters in Venice, an extraordinary Christmas in Alexandria, unexpected pregnancies, lost love, diagnosis with serious conditions, all treated with a somewhat black, compelling humour. Here is the link and I hope you enjoy them. http://tiny.cc/rkqaow

Stabbing the Rain

I have reached a milestone birthday since I last wrote.  It was a larger number than I care to admit to, but it marks the time to stop waiting for that Martine McCutcheon perfect moment to arrive. Time to achieve what you have always dreamed of achieving. So as well as losing 2.5 stone this year and getting back into clothes I haven't worn since my 24 year old was born, I would also love to show the UK publishing world that short stories, as in the US, are just as formidable and compelling a genre as novels. The short story writer aims to encapsulate a critical moment (not always perfect)within a life, and all, as Jamie Oliver says, in 15 minutes!
   We create a character's history, a past, an intense present, and the hint of a future. Some are left hanging on a cliff edge, leaving you wondering or guessing.  Some have a twist - glorious in horror stories. Some are wrapped up neatly. Mine do all of those. I like them to add satisfyingly, but not necessarily tritely. We want you wanting more. Some could even build into a full length novel one day.
    So far the only novels and short stories I have published have been erotic (see my other blog, Primula's Progress).  But the sexy build up, climax, afterglow analogy of erotica is useful for any story telling arc.
   Start with inspiration from a snapshot spotted in the street or out of a train window, a note or comment sounded in your own life, something funny or touching the kids have said, comic or tragic stories from the world around us, a crazy, sad, mad idea plucked out of an over-active imagination. Then you nick it, dress it, trick it out in technicolour or monochrome depending on the mood you want (I have a kind of telly, cinematic commentary going on in the back of my mind when writing, seeing it all on screen as well).  Then load it with drama and potential, taking it with the tools of a handful of bright characters and realistic, relevant dialogue, to whatever conclusion you want for it.
     My youngest son coined the muscular phrase 'Stabbing the Rain' which is the title of my Amazon collection. The stories commit to fiction moments from real life: mysterious encounters in Venice, an extraordinary Christmas in Alexandria, unexpected pregnancies, lost love, diagnosis with serious conditions, all treated with a somewhat black, compelling humour. Here is the link and I hope you enjoy them.  http://tiny.cc/rkqaow